Exit Stage Left

You may recall this post and this one from last September. While I was being quite vague about what was going on back then I think that nearly a year later I'm ready to 'fes up to what I did. Basically, I threw myself at a boy who paid a little too much attention to me at my high school reunion last year. I'm not generally the most forward girl when it comes to admitting my feelings in that department, so my sending a strongly worded, rather blunt e-mail on the subject was really quite bold, not to mention out of character. I kept asking myself, "will you regret doing it if you do it, or not doing it if you don't do it?" In the end I decided I would more regret not doing it than doing it. After all, what are the chances I would ever see this dude again anyway? Well...at least not until my 20 year reunion, of course. So I took the plunge and I don't regret it...not even now.

On Monday morning-bright and early-I boarded a flight to Seattle (details omitted for the time-being). I was, of course, later leaving the house than I'd planned, got caught in traffic on my way to the airport and arrived at my gate right at the end of the boarding process. While I was waiting in line, frantically text messaging everyone I know, I glanced to my right and could've sworn I saw the aforementioned guy with whom I went to high school with his head tossed back against the seat, snoring quietly while a dull, boring looking girl sat next to him. I did a double, followed quickly by a triple,-take clearly making the dull-looking girl uncomfortable. While I was on the jet way I could feel someone staring at me, could feel the eyes drilling into the back of my head, so I turned around. There he was. The high school boy. Staring right at me. As soon as I caught his eye he looked away, avoiding me. "Whatever," I thought, "I'm making this up. It's not him, there's no way, it's too weird." Like something you dream about happening, but never actually does. But, at the same time, I knew it was him... it was totally him.

When I got to my seat I whipped around as quickly as I could to see if I could figure out where he was sitting, but he had vanished into the sea of people on the plane. I figured I'd bolt off the plane and see if I could catch up with him when I got off the plane. I've known this kid for twelve years, we exchanged e-mails for weeks before the verbal diarrhea hit me and I decided to spill my guts to him, he should talk to me. This should not be a big deal. I'm over it, he should be too.

When the plane landed I had roughly an hour and a half to kill, so wandering around the airport looking for the dull, boring girl and the former high school crush was really no big deal, so I headed down to baggage claim area and spotted him instantly. I was not entirely comfortable walking up and saying "hi" so I mostly tried to make it obvious that I was there: pacing in front of the carousel where he was standing and the like. I was, of course, constantly engaged in something else going on, paying little attention to the people around me. In short: I was being slightly passive aggressive and a bit of a pansy. In the end, he never did say anything to me and suddenly he was no where to be found.

I don't know what it is about this boy that gives me such chutzpah, but shortly after his disappearing act I sent him a text message that said, "Were you really just ignoring me on that flight from Denver to Seattle?" I didn't ever get a response, which pretty much confirmed that it was him. Ultimately I don't really care, I just think it's funny that I have a bigger pair than he does.