Exit Stage Left

I'm not a crier. I cry when I'm super-excited and when I'm super-frustrated, but I'm so rarely sad or upset I don't really cry as a result of those emotions. A good commercial can choke me up, but it's never enough to induce water works and while I distinctly remember bawling like a baby when I saw "My Girl" I was only 13 so that doesn't really count. So, you can only imagine how odd it is--and how bad I must've felt--that I locked myself in my office at 10:30 this morning and just cried. I cried uncontrollably for most of the day and when I wasn't crying uncontrollably I was using all my might to keep myself from crying uncontrollably. I left to use the bathroom but made no small talk, I heated up my lunch, but refused to make eye contact with anyone and felt slightly reclusive as I pushed my door shut time after time. After six hours of virtually non-stop crying I had a wicked headache and felt and looked pretty much like shit, so even though I didn't feel like being social, when a friend and colleague e-mailed and suggested we play hooky and go to a movie I jumped at the chance and felt not the slightest amount of guilt for leaving early.

Despite my blurred vision, thumping head and foul demeanor I got so much done today I'm rethinking my normal, average, behavior in favor of being whiny, distant and overtly negative. Oh, wait...is that really rethinking my normal behavior? Well then, maybe tomorrow will just be average. In that case, I better remember my Kleenex.